How Old I Am

By Laurie Kolp

Avon calling, Aqua-net old
Baby Jessica down the well, bright blue mascara old
Candy stick cigarettes, cassette tapes old
Dr. Scholls originals old
Espadrilles & Sarsaparilla old
Finger-lickin’-good, floppy discs old
Gang of Sugarhill rappin’ delight old
Hooked-rug kits, Holly Hobby old
It’s Not Nice to Fool Mother Nature chiffon old
Jolt cola, 867-5309/Jenny old
KISS, Keep-it-simple-stupid old
Legg’s pantyhose, let’s do the time warp again old
My Three Sons, Mr. Rogers, Mrs. Beasley old
Neighborhood of make-believe, not really that old
Opie Taylor, OP shorts old
Pinkie rings & shrinky-dinks old
Quaaludes, Lucy-in-the-Sky-with-Diamonds old
Roll-on lip gloss old
Snap-On plastic rollers, Sunshine family, old
Twiggy, tube-top rompers old
USSR, Berlin wall kicked goes down old
VHS/VCR be kind rewind old
Walking with a Walkman, who-shot-JR old
Yellow submarine old
Zoom, Ziggy, Ze plane! Ze plane! old